Our Best Salesmen

When I was in school I learned a little about sales. A good advertisement or salesman, I learned, can create the perception of a need and then convince you that they are the best ones to meet that need. We don't need to “sell” MYC Clubs to the kids or to our community. The needs we try to help meet don't need to be created; they are all too real in a society short on fathers. God's people are the best ones to help meet the needs. We don't have salesman on staff here; our kids and their families can be our best salesmen. Kids who keep coming and parents who want to know when their younger kids can start coming do our “advertising.” Kids who want their friends to come to Club are some of our best public relations agents. We aren't selling something to the kids but we are making sure that they hear that Easter celebrates God's free gift of salvation. We can concentrate on serving, not selling.

Earlier today I visited the family of one of our MYC Primary Club members. He had missed a few days because of the flu so he couldn't be at our Easter celebration. We enjoy our Club kids and miss seeing them when they aren't here. His mom told me that he was back at school and we should see him at Club today. That was encouraging, but the most encouraging comments came next. Mom said that before school he had reminded her that she was not to worry about him after school because he would be at MYC. She added that he likes to come and was sorry that he had to miss because of the flu. His little brother then asked her, “Can I go to MYC, too?” This little guy is in kindergarten, so we are expecting him to join MYC this summer and be with us next school year.

Last week, another mother made sure to tell me that, although her daughter was going to have to miss Club for a couple of weeks, she would be back as soon as possible and that both of them wanted her to “keep her spot in Club.” They knew that others were waiting to take her place if she wasn't going to be able to return. Conversations like these confirm to us that we are meeting some needs for these kids, their families, and for the community. “I'm glad you all are doing what you do. Kids need something positive to do!” is a comment I hear often. That's definitely true, but we want to meet needs that are way beyond just something for kids to do. Kids need somewhere safe where they can have fun and feel welcome. Kids need to feel valued and that they belong somewhere. Kids need help with homework. Kids need positive relationships with adults who like to be with them and won't abandon them. Most of all, kids need to know and enjoy God, and to have the joy of knowing and following his word.

Whether it is a snack, gym time, memorizing wisdom from the Bible, or making sure homework is understood, we strive to meet these needs with a healthy dose of love and attention. The needs never stop, but we enjoy serving God by serving His children. We don't have something to sell; we have someone to serve.

Even Jesus Needed a Dad

Merry Christmas!! I thought I'd enjoy saying that while it's still legal here in America. (Actually, I'll still be saying it when the haters make it illegal!) Christmas is about Christ and it always will be about Him. I hope you can celebrate His birthday knowing Him personally and that you invite Him to the celebration at your church or with your family.

This morning there was a notice in our local newspaper to an “unknown father.” Someone is trying to adopt a child who needs a family and they are required to attempt to find and notify the biological “father.” To tell the truth, he's not ever been the “real father” if he needs to be found in this manner! Today I attended a funeral for a man who gave his life to save his son. This man was a hero and his sacrifice imitated Christ. His family didn't need to put a notice in the paper to find him.

Have you ever thought about the fact that, even though Jesus had the perfect, ultimate dad in heaven, His heavenly father knew that He would need a human father on earth? Even God's son needed an earthly father to hold Him and spend time with Him and mentor Him while He was away from home on this earth. God chose Joseph and that had to be an awesome privilege and joy for Joseph. Debbie and I have had the privilege and joy to be chosen to be the adoptive parents for two girls, and now are also enjoying the treasure of grandkids.

There are a couple of disgusting and horribly deceitful bills in congress at this time which, if passed, will hurt children and families and our whole country and culture. One is dishonestly called the “Every Child Deserves a Family” Act. This would force adoption and foster care agencies to put innocent children in homes with homosexual “parents” and with no care for marital status. If congress has sunk low enough to pass this, then there will be helpless children forced into homes where they will be raped by homosexual “men”. Kids will be abused and neglected by adults who don't even care enough and aren't mature enough to commit to a marriage before they live together or try to adopt a child. The relationship between the adults aren't permanent, so they won't be capable of meeting the needs of children. The foster and adoptive systems are supposed to provide for children and protect them and not provide them to homosexual pedophiles or immature people trying to meet their own needs by adopting! Kids deserve parents who provide and protect, not perverts who want their perversions approved.

Another lie in congress is deceitfully called the “Respect For Marriage” act and is an attempt by those who have no respect for families and are willing to destroy America by repealing DOMA.

Our biggest problem in America is not the economy. It's a moral problem, a sin problem, and a common sense problem! I hope to blog more on this subject as we get closer to the next election.

Jesus didn't have to look for an “unknown” father. He had Joseph on earth and His father in heaven. Joseph was a real man and a real husband. Mary and Joseph had a real marriage and were good parents. Let's all be good parents during the season when we celebrate the birth of Jesus the Messiah.

Thank You, God!

Thank You, God

for grace, mercy, and love

for Jesus

for your sacrifice

for the cross

for the empty tomb

for defeating sin, Satan, and death

for giving us a purpose and hope

for salvation and forgiveness

for peace and joy

for the Holy Spirit

for Debbie

for blessing our marriage

for my parents

for my brothers and sister

for my daughters Tamara and Sheria

for each of my grandkids: Alydia and Clayton, Maddox and McKinnley, and for Tia and TJ

for Debbie's family

for the Union Mission, the Mission Youth Center, and for Camp

for my job

for choosing us to help do your work

for each child or teenager we have gotten to know

for our co-workers

for my education

for electricity, running water, and air conditioning

for our home and our furniture

for our cars

for this computer

for our church and our pastors and leaders

for my health and for Debbie's health

for our country which was founded and led by Christians

for blessing our country (We are not just “lucky” like Obama says)

for the freedom to write this note

for keeping your promises

for your word, the Bible

for Christmas, for your first coming as a baby and for your promised second coming

for answering prayer

Are We Successful?

One morning this week I saw one of our 2nd grade MYC Club boys at the doctor with his mother. When I asked them how he was doing, his mom answered that he wanted to go back to school after his doctor visit so that he could go to MYC that afternoon. It's encouraging to hear that kind of feedback. It helps because it isn't always clear how to define and measure success in a ministry to children where relationships are emphasized.

Occasionally we are asked if we are successful here at MYC. Before I can answer I always need to first ask how should we define success. Is it how many donations we receive? Is it how many kids we serve? Is it counting how many kids make a commitment to follow Christ? Is it about making a positive difference in the lives of children or in the community? How long should “success” take?

We have seen our share of disappointments. A family we have come to know moves away and we lose touch. A girl gets pregnant. Boys lose their temper or fight. Someone gets arrested or suspended from school. Kids reject Jesus' sacrifice and example, or a spiritual commitment fails to translate to Christ-like behavior. Kids lie to us or talk about risky behavior on Facebook.

These kids and their families are facing some serious barriers to what we in America or even in the church call success. Parents ignore God's design for the family and the children pay an awful price. “Friends” put pressure on them to make stupid choices. The neighborhood is a negative environment. The government subsidizes poor choices and encourages dependence on government instead of faith in God. Entertainment is perverted and violent. Hormones are raging. The pop culture says “It's all about me!” There are few jobs here. Hate and anger are common in many of these families. Our kids act as if they are deaf. We have limited time with them at MYC.

We see some encouraging signs, too! Kids return to MYC year after year, and even stay after high school. Parents trust us and send younger siblings. Parents who were themselves involved in Mission youth activities 10 or 20 years ago are making sure that their kids are involved in MYC. These parents have good memories and built relationships with MYC staff and want their kids to have the same opportunity. There are school successes. Kids want to volunteer or be MYC leaders. We see better behavior in MYC kids when compared to new kids or non-Club members at church, Camp, or school. The Timothy Project discipleship group continues. Relationships are built. We have a consistent, dependable, loving staff. The only age we recruit is 1st grade because there is a waiting list for kids to be in MYC in the other grades. Many of our kids attend church with staff. We see growth in our long-term kids, such as unselfishness, controlling anger, or spiritual maturity. Most Youth Enterprises graduates have jobs. We get to be involved in our kids accomplishments and milestones. Kids and families come to us for help outside of MYC. Kids develop new skills. We have our first Eagle Scout. There is personal growth in the staff. Attendance in MYC is high. God meets the needs of MYC as we strive to meet the needs of our community.

Are we successful? Ultimately God will be the definer and judge of that. We are responsible to be faithful and good stewards of our time, resources, and gifts. We are trusting in God for the results, and we praise Him that He is trustworthy to keep His promises.

Just Wait Until Your Uncle Gets Home!

Wait Until Your Uncle Gets Home!

It seems like I hear more of our MYC Club kids talk about their uncles than about their dads.

It's been clear to me for many years now that the most common cause of pain to the at-risk kids with whom we work is the lack of a father in the home or in the lives of our kids. If you haven't already read my book “Front Line Observer, please give it a look if you would like to understand more about this sad epidemic. What I've begun to notice recently is who are the most common replacements for permanent male relationships with these kids. It may not be who you think. The substitute dad isn't the grandpa, step dad, mom's boyfriend, or even a brother, although I've seen some exceptions. From what I have seen, it looks like the most common, most permanent male relationship these kids have is with a maternal uncle or otherwise possibly an older brother. Like the biological “fathers” of these kids, the grandfathers, step dads, and mom's boyfriends or temporary live-in “fiance” are only temporary and often negative relationships in the lives of these kids. The male relatives on the father's side often drop out of the relationship along with the father, and the grandfather often was not a good example to his own son. True, many of our kids have step brothers or half brothers, but they also are too often a temporary relationship or a poor example. The males that we have remaining in these kids' lives tend to be mom's brother or half brother, or maybe a brother who has the same mom but often a different dad.

So, you may respond, at least there is a male role model in the home in the form of mom's brother or an older sibling. The fact is, though, that this relationship doesn't usually meet the needs of the child and is more often just another poor role model. Remember: he came from the same incomplete family and so he wasn't mentored by a good male role model himself. If mom's younger brother lives with her, then he is often immature and unwilling or incapable of being responsible for himself, much less for a needy and impressionable niece or nephew. An older sibling often has simply gone further down the wrong path. At least, because he is a blood relative on the mom's side, the relationship tends more toward being permanent. What I have noticed, however, is that these guys way too often tend to be unemployed, in legal trouble or in a gang, have perverted attitudes, or have gotten another girl pregnant themselves. For an extreme example, one of the young men in a family with whom we work was recently murdered at home by his own maternal uncle, who had recently gotten out of prison. Some of the moms I know have gotten into legal trouble or have lost their homes due to the behavior of a brother who mooches off of them. Other moms have gotten into trouble because of their loyalty to their own kids or to the the overgrown children who got them pregnant.

So, you may feel that this trend is no big deal or that it's a permanent part of our culture now. Maybe these kids should just get past the fact that their dads have disappeared. They can learn about life from teachers or older guys in the neighborhood and the government pays for their home and food. What's the problem? The problem is that there are severe consequences to our kids and to our culture. We who know, love, and serve these kids see anger, violence, school failure, dangerous behavior, problems bonding or trusting, disrespect to women and authority, selfishness, irresponsibility, and attention-seeking behavior, just to identify a few of the consequences. We have too many boys who seem to believe that they are only good for fighting or for getting girls pregnant. Society doesn't teach them this twisted view. They learn this from their “dads” and from their moms who tolerate and encourage immature behavior by the dads.

Uncles and older brothers can't completely take the place of dads. Neither can we here at MYC with a few hours each week with our kids. What we can do here is to have men and married couples on staff. We are trying to step in and step up, and I challenge the other men in our community to do so. Every mom should be able to say, “Just wait until your father gets home!”

My Mom Can Beat Up Your Mom!

“My mom can beat up your mom!” “You should see my mom fight!” “Our neighbors are afraid of my mom!” Is it just me, or does this kind of bragging just sound bizarre? I've heard this recent perversion of an old traditional boast from some of our MYC kids lately. If bragging about fighting isn't stupid enough by itself, then feeling proud of your mom for her ability to be violent is pathetic. Things get sadly twisted when dad isn't around to be the provider and protector, or when the kids don't know enough about dad to brag about him. Last year a 12 year-old boy threatened me that his dad would beat me up, (his way of saying it was too foul to print here), because I wouldn't let the boy butt in front of a line of smaller boys in order to be the first to hit a pinata. I knew his family situation. He bounced back and forth between mom and grandma and dad wasn't around. I could have reminded him that he couldn't even find his dad to have him try to beat me up, or that his dad was probably in jail or to too drunk to do it. Instead I just told him, as I was escorting him out the door, that his dad could come and speak to me about his behavior if he wanted to do so. There was no need to remind this hostile young boy of reality and increase his pain or his need to pretend that his dad was capable of standing up for him. Anger is a common trait among kids with dads who have disappeared from their lives. I never heard from his dad and felt no need to hide or to get some big friends.

God created the family and the role of the father includes responsibilities that require staying with the kids and the mother of the kids. Some of these responsibilities are to provide a home and other physical needs, and to protect the family from harm. In the work I do and the kids I know, I am constantly being reminded of the damage done to children and to our society by guys who get a girl pregnant and then leave her and the kids to fend for themselves. A new service is opening in our town for housing mothers and children. I have to admit that, unfortunately, there is a need for such a facility. I also know that this will not permanently solve the problem for our community or for the women living there temporarily. The problem will be solved and prevented when men act like men and take responsibility for their actions and for the consequences of those actions. If you really are a man, you won't have sex or get a woman pregnant until you are faithfully and permanently married to her and are committed to doing your best to meet the needs of your kids. Instead of only treating the symptom, we also need to admit and solve the problem. Ideally, why should this home for women need to ask the community for money? Get it from the guys that got them pregnant! The destruction of the family didn't start with the homosexuals. It started with irresponsible guys and the girls and the government who allow and encourage them to get away with ignoring their responsibilities. God's way is the only way that works. The tragedy of homeless unwed mothers has a solution. Let's obey God and solve it!

Llama Eggs

“Why is that llama laying down over there?” “It's sitting on it's eggs!” This bit of wisdom was overheard during an exchange between two of our primary MYC Club kids. Twenty-four of us were enjoying a close-up look at some exotic animals while riding through the Tennessee Safari Park in Alamo, TN. I had never heard of llama eggs, but she talked with the confidence of an expert. I love to hear little ones talk, whether it's grand kids or club kids. They remind me of a quote from Ronald Reagan, where he said that it's “not that they're ignorant, it's just that they know so much that isn't so!”

We are all ignorant in some ways; it's impossible for a human to know everything. Ignorance can actually be a step to gaining wisdom, if we recognize our ignorance, stop arguing and making excuses, and diligently seek the truth. I believe that when we are in heaven, we will get to use all of our capabilities, including all of our brains. Meanwhile, while we are still on earth, we have to put up with others who “know so much that isn't so!” Such wisdom from children is funny and usually harmless. The problem is when we make choices or react to something based upon something that we think we know but about which we are ignorant or deceived. That's not funny or harmless. For instance, when one of our know-it-all kids argues a call with the referee, he then gets put out of the game. Another example is a government that thinks it can spend itself out of debt into prosperity. One of our kids had not developed good interview skills, but assumed she wasn't hired at a restaurant because of her race. If you make your choices based upon these kinds of “wisdom”, then you will keep making stupid mistakes.

These are just a few examples of the dangers of acting from ignorance. By far the biggest danger, though, is our ignorance of God and His Word. When I talk about spiritual matters with our Club kids, I sometimes ask how we know if we are a Christian or how we can know that we are going to heaven. There are three common but dangerously ignorant answers I hear. One is that you earn your way to heaven by being good. Another is about an emotional experience at church. The third is about with which church they are involved. Some of these kids seem almost inoculated to the true message of Christ by this false “wisdom.” Jesus himself clearly said that He is the way, the truth, and the life and that no one will come to God except through Him. I pray that all of our kids, everyone I love, and anyone reading this will not be toward God's Word like the kid who argues with the referee and gets an attitude and blames others for being out of the game. Eternity is a lot longer than a ballgame, llamas don't lay eggs, and we are all invited to Heaven through Jesus!

They Keep Coming Back!

“I'm going to stay in MYC Club until high School!” “Me too, I wish we could come every day!” This was part of a conversation between a couple of our MYC Primary Club kids as we were getting out of the van and walking into MYC. I took what I heard as a show of enthusiasm and not a warning! We enjoy their smiles and displays of excitement, and we're glad that they want to be with us. Most of our kids come to Club or Camp year after year, unless the family moves out of town. Why do they keep coming back? Is it the food? The games in the gym? The social time? Lessons about God's love? Is it homework time? (Probably not!) While most of these are reasons our kids come back, we believe that the relationships with the MYC staff and volunteers has a lot to do with it. We try to make sure they know that we love them and that we want them to be here. MYC is not just a job where we watch the clock and can't wait until we can go home. (Although honestly, with at-risk kids there are days when we are tempted to do this!)

One of the many ways God has blessed MYC is that we have staff and volunteers who stay here for years. Another way we are blessed is to have married couples working together here. I'm especially blessed to get to work closely with my wife, Debbie. Relationships are built when the kids come year after year and get to spend time with the same adults every year. Relationships are key to what we do here, and there is no substitute for time in developing them. This is clear to us and may be so obvious to you that you may be wondering why I am wasting space and your time by writing about it. The sad reality, however, is that many of the parents of these kids don't seem to understand this truth. Dads or even moms are sometimes completely missing from the lives of our kids. Some see their dad for only a few days in the summer. Many live with a grandma or another relative instead of with parents. Many move around often, in and out of the homes of various relatives or friends. It's not uncommon for our kids to have to make calls after Club to ask where we need to drop them off, or for us to drive to more than one house in order to find an adult who is available to supervise them. Moms will have various “men” in and out of the home, which confuses the kids and can put them in danger. These kinds of choices by the parents are the reasons why these kids are at-risk. Parents who can't commit often raise kids who can't cope.

This is why we are here. This is why we have both men and women serving here. This is why it's so great to have married couples spending time with these kids. The kids see that we love each other and that we love them. When they know that they will see the same faces year after year, they keep coming back.

If I Disappear

Record-breaking earthquakes around the world.

Record-breaking or crazy weather, such as the floods, snow, and hail here in West Tennessee.

People pushing for a one-world currency system. Governments in deep debt or going bankrupt.

Oil prices and food prices. Famine in places like North Korea, Uganda, Ethiopia, and Pakistan.

Political unrest all over the Middle East and in Africa. Threats and attacks against Israel.

Gay “marriage” and other perversions. Awarding special status, position, and protection to gays.

Little concern for human life, such as the drug war in Mexico and killing unborn babies in the USA.

Creeping socialism. More people depending on the government to meet all needs or solve problems.

The federal government eager to take over the responsibilities and privileges of local and state governments, charities, or families.

An administration, congress, and courts who ignore, circumvent, or try to reinvent the Constitution.

Government leaders who insult Christians but honor Islam, earth worship, and other false religions.

Anti Christian and anti Israel hate. Our leaders turning against Israel and toward Israel's enemies.

Persecution of Christians is an epidemic, although ignored by our government and media.

Powerful people push for a “new world order,” or “globalization” or “global governance.”

Sharia law in the US courts. The UN becoming increasingly dominated by Marxists and Muslims.

Political correctness: “tolerance” of anything except Christianity. Revising history to eliminate God.

Lukewarm churches and lukewarm Christians, who look like the world instead of Jesus.

These are some of the events and conditions in the world in the last couple of years which may be fulfillment of Bible prophecy. I won't pretend to know for sure that we are on the threshold of the end times, and I'm not making a prediction, but as a Christian I have a responsibility. I need to be God's instrument to make certain that everyone I love, anyone I can influence, and everyone with whom I serve here at MYC is ready for the promised return of Christ. You are ready if you have put your trust in Christ, the risen Son of God.
If there is a rapture of the church as one of the events in Christ's return, I and all Christians will disappear in a flash! I'm praying and working for MYC to suddenly be empty because all of the kids will disappear with us. I hope my family and everyone I know disappears. Actually, I can't think of anyone who I hope will be left behind to endure hell on earth. Jesus didn't want anyone left behind either, so He died for all of us. We just finished celebrating His resurrection. Unfortunately, there will be those left behind who have chosen to ignore God's love and the Bible's warnings. I hope you aren't one of them! If I disappear, I'll be with Jesus! If you are reading this after I disappear, don't look for me, but look into God's word and to Jesus for your salvation!

We Will Still Defend Marriage!

Anger issues.
Immaturity, impulsiveness, selfishness, and self control issues. Inability to delay gratification.
Poor social skills, attention craving, insecure, and poor manners. Whining or constantly worried.
School behavior and success issues, and legal trouble.
Disrespect of others. Inappropriate behavior. Lack of reverence. Personal drama creation.
Drug addiction.
Listening and following directions issues. Inability to keep a job. Authority issues.
Bonding issues. Quitting a relationship, a team, a job, or school. Trust issues.
Moral issues. Honesty issues. Sexual perversion issues. Sexually transmitted diseases.
Hitting or fighting as a way to react to or resolve conflict.
Sociopathic behavior. (Not recognizing the rights of others or showing remorse for hurting others.)
Much more likely to be abused, abandoned, or neglected.
Poor choice of role models. Celebrity worship. Gang involvement.
Confusion about God.
Confusion about love. Love is misunderstood to be conditional or temporary; only a brief feeling.
Cheating at school or in sports.
Bullying. Hating.
Depression.

These are only some of the common behavior traits and character issues which we have seen in our work with children who have parents who have decided not to follow God's plan for a marriage and for a family. Sexual partners who cannot commit to a traditional marriage produce kids with serious problems. (If you are interested in more of what we have learned about this issue, please read my book, entitled Front Line Observer.) We have seen the casualties of the war against the family, and now some in our government have chosen to inflict even more.

Now we have a leader in Washington who has claimed that the Defense of Marriage Act is somehow unconstitutional, and some in congress who are trying to overturn it. What God has designed and what human nature, human needs, and human history have confirmed is suddenly against our law? This leader has made many bad policy decisions, but this one cancels his right to be our leader. A chief law enforcer who tells his Justice Department to no longer defend our law which confirms marriage as a union between one man and one woman has forfeited his right to leadership and has no moral authority to tell anyone what to do. This decision may cause more damage to our nation and to our people than anything else has ever caused. This policy is consistent with the definition of a sociopath, and ignores reality and the will of the people. To give special rights, privileges, and status to some people, simply because they like to have perverted sex with members of the same gender, is immoral and dangerous beyond description. God loves everyone, and made laws for our protection and provision. He designed our bodies and emotions and knew that homosexuality was unnatural, unsafe, destructive, and perverted.

Here at the Mission Youth Center, we defend marriage and we demonstrate it. We are blessed to have committed married couples serving here. Showing true love and real marriage helps meet one of the greatest needs we can meet for the kids who come here, because almost all of them live with the pain of being from a “family” which has chosen some kind of “alternative lifestyle”. You can't defy God and the natural order He created without inflicting painful consequences and you cannot redefine marriage in order to pacify perversion without destroying people.

My Day In Court

My Day In Court

Last month I spent a day in court. No, I haven't been arrested or charged with anything, (at least yet!). It was a session of our county's Child and Family Court known commonly around here as “child support court.” The official reason for spending a morning there was for me to testify for one of our former foster daughters in a hearing involving custody and child support for one of her children. Not surprisingly, the “father” of the child never even bothered to show up, even though he had requested the hearing. He had apparently done so to harass the mother of his child, but later had realized that the truth about his behavior was about to be exposed in court, so as is his habit, he took the easy way out.

As it turns out, there were three hearings that morning that were of interest to me. One was the case I have described, another was for the “father” of one of my grandkids, and the third involved another of the girls who had lived with Debbie and I when we were houseparents at New Life Youth Home. All morning I sat and watched and listened to a sad parade of selfish people who cared little or none about meeting the needs of their own children. I saw anger, sadness, frustration, drama, delays, accusations, complications, and a sickening display of immature excuses from “men” and sometimes “women” who didn't want to take responsibility for their own actions.

Some of these guys couldn't pay child support because they were escorted to court from the jail. Some had addictions which they had allowed to control them instead of the instinct to provide for themselves and their families. Some were just lazy, irresponsible children themselves. Some were going to jail that day unless they paid some child support. One man was even arrested and put in handcuffs in front of his teenage daughter for his outstanding warrants. His daughter had been brought to court for her unruly behavior, and he had come to convince the judge to give him custody of her instead of putting her into treatment. Now both “dad” and daughter are in the custody of the state and are costing money to the taxpayers. I wonder what he was smoking that morning to think the judge would give the girl to him. I don't have to wonder why her behavior was habitually bad.

Guys, you need to “man up” so I will no longer need to put quotation marks around the words “man” or “father” when I refer to you. I'm even offering to help! If you will read it and put the advice to dads into action in your lives, I will give you a free copy of my book, Front Line Observer. It's time to act like men!

Sanctity of Life

Sanctity of Human Life Week

“This is murder! The president should do something about this!” These are some of the passionate responses of our MYC high school kids to a video we had just watched together. Kermit Gosnell, a baby killer from Philadelphia, was the subject of a CNN interview with a Philly district attorney. It was the killing of a woman and at least seven babies born alive which prompted these responses from the kids. In case you haven't heard, Mr. (I can't call him doctor) Gosnell has gotten rich performing late term “abortions” by inducing labor and then killing the babies after the children were out of the womb alive. The woman had died from anesthesiology he had prescribed. There are more grisly details I will not mention here. Feel free to look up this story if you have a strong stomach or if you have been deceived to believe abortion is a medical “choice.”

“You couldn't pay me enough to work for him!” “I could never do that!” “If he killed my child, I'd kill him, but then I'd be guilty, too! ” These were more of the responses. “God would forgive him if he repented.”, and “Yes, God would forgive him because we have a forgiving God!”, are also quotes from kids in the discussion. In terms of insight, passion, and participation, this was one of the best talks we have had with our older club kids. I believe that some of them understand that once it becomes accepted to do something like kill unborn babies in the womb, then the next steps would include killing babies after they are born, or maybe the handicapped or elderly. The only part of the CNN interview and our talk for which they had no response was when, after it was suggested that our president should stop this kind of murder, I asked if they would like to know Obama's position on this issue. After they said yes, I had to tell the disappointed group that as an Illinois State Senator, he had voted against a law that would have required doctors to give medical care to save the lives of babies who had survived attempts to kill them and had been born alive. Support for Obama during the election had been unanimous for the kids in MY club when we took a poll. I didn't grab for a “gotcha!”moment and wasn't even tempted to follow with “I told you so!”, but just let the kids think quietly for a few seconds before jump-starting the conversation with another question. My goal in showing the video wasn't to bash Obama, but to encourage these kids to recognize what is right and wrong, and to realize where allowing wrong to be the law of our land is leading us.

A Baby for Christmas

A Baby for Christmas

December 22, in a hospital room in Jackson, Debbie and I held our newborn grandchild, McKinnley. Debbie even had the privilege of being with Sheria and participating in McKinnley's birth. With this birth fresh on my mind, I would like to share some brief Christmas Eve thoughts with you.

I think of Mary, and especially of Joseph, holding the newborn boy. (I feel sorry for the grandparents who weren't there.) The creator of the universe depended upon this young, poor couple for everything. Our omnipotent God couldn't even hold up his own head.

As I hold the baby and talk to her mom and listen to Debbie describe the birth, I can't understand how some people can believe in accidental evolution instead of a wise creator. The process of pregnancy and birth, with everything happening at just the right time, and the intricacy of this precious child scream out for a creator. Something as amazing and complicated as this isn't just be random chance.

How twisted are the minds of parents who neglect, abuse, or abandon a child. How infuriatingly selfish can a guy be to abandon the mother of his child to raise the baby alone. How disgustingly self-centered is a mom who acts like her kids are just someone else to manipulate to meet her own needs. How unnatural it is to kill your unborn baby because it will be inconvenient to your selfish lifestyle or agenda. Yet in our work with kids we see this kind of revolting attitude too often. I thank God for being so loving and unselfish that He gave himself to us. This is why I celebrate Christmas!

MYC Graduates

MYC Graduates

Here at the Mission Youth Center, there is a small but consistent and slowly-growing group of boys who are still coming to Club after high school graduation. This is encouraging development in our ministry and is a natural result of our relationship-based work. We pray and hope that we can continue to meet some of the needs of these guys, and that eventually some of our MYC graduates will be working here. On every high school Club night this fall we have had from three to six graduates.

I know that some of the reasons that these boys have continued to be involved with us may be thought by some as negative reasons, such as not going off to college or not having a dad around and so they still need to continue their relationship with the men who work here. Other reasons are simple, such as a chance to see their friends or play some basketball or just for something to do. Our favorite reasons are that they value the relationships and positive role models here. This is one of the reasons why I am so thankful for the staff here at MYC and the long-term commitments they make and examples they set. Whatever the reason, it is an opportunity for ministry and discipleship that we value. So far it has only been the boy graduates who keep coming, and we hope that will change, but we understand that most of our girls are not as attracted by the chance to play in our gym, and some are expected to babysit and to take over other responsibilities around the house for their families once they graduate.

One of the “growing pains” we experience by having kids who are no longer in school had been simply to figure out what these guys could be doing during the time the other Club kids are doing homework. Our solution to this has been to have a special “graduates only” class which hopefully will challenge them to think about serious issues, make wise choices from a Christian worldview, and mature to the next level. I tell them that this is an exciting and critical part of their life because it is when they decide who they really are and what they really believe. I try to challenge them to explore what they believe and why they believe it, versus just going with what they have been taught. I emphasize that you know what you really believe by the choices you make. We are using the True U: Does God Exist? from Focus On the Family, which is sort of a college level version of The Truth Project. This series pits four worldviews against one another to see which one gives the best answers and the best life. I have enjoyed the questions and conversations which have come from watching portions of the videos, but more importantly some of the boys seem to really be thinking and getting into the subject. I hope they can see that real Christianity is the only worldview that gives hope, inner peace, and purpose to our lives.

Don't Listen to the Lies!

Don't Listen to the Lies

Last week we took our MYC high school club kids to a local church to watch “To Save a Life.” This is a movie for adults and teenagers that deals with serious issues such as honesty, friendship, drinking and drugs, pregnancy, and especially suicide. The next morning a high school boy from our church killed himself at his home. He was not in MYC Club but some of our kids knew him from school or the band, bowling team, or church youth group. He even had gone with the youth group to our camp the previous day as part of a volunteer work project. Debbie and I know his mom and his older siblings from the years we spent as youth sponsors in the youth group, but we didn't really know this boy.

I won't pretend to know why he made this choice or what he was thinking, but I do know that he must have been listening to Satan's lies. Satan's lies come through music or other entertainment media, from “friends” or sometimes even from family, from society, advertising, or even from school, from false religions or philosophies, or sometimes just directly into our minds in the battle to influence our choices. There are some horrible lies out there which are meant to manipulate us, keep us from knowing and understanding our value and purpose, or even to destroy us. Evolution is a lie that tries to convince us that we are just random accidents with no meaning, value, or purpose. The boy who killed himself in “To Save a Life” believed the lie that he was unimportant. Advertising and entertainment lie to us about how we should look, dress, act, or feel,and try to tell us that we don't fit in if we don't comply False religions and cults lie to us by telling us that God could not have come to earth as a person, or didn't die for our sins, or doesn't know us individually and love us unconditionally.

How can we know if Satan or his servants are lying to us and trying to manipulate us? The best way to know for sure if something is a lie is to know the truth. We find the truth in God's word. The truth is that we are all unique creations of God, and that He made us all different but loves us all the same. The truth is that we all have a purpose, meaning, importance, and value. The truth is that God loves us enough to send His own son for us, to forgive us, and offer to adopt us into His family. The truth is that God has gifts and talents for all of us to be used for His people and His glory. The truth is that God wants a relationship with us and that we don't have to earn our way to heaven by following rules or doing good. The truth is also that Satan hates us and works to drown out the truth by surrounding us with lies or tricking us by taking part of the truth and twisting it into a lie. The truth is also that if we spend the time God has given us listening to the wrong music or the wrong peers or even our own wrong thoughts that we can be tricked into thinking that we don't matter to God or other people, and that the answer is in destructive choices like meth or perverted sex or money or even suicide. Please don't listen to the lies!

How Long Do You Think You Can Do This?

How Long Do You Think You Can Do This?

“How long have you been working with kids?” “H ow long do you think you will be able to do this?” “Do you think you will ever retire or do something else? I get questions like this every once in awhile. A few times the questions have come from kids, but usually they will come from an adult who can't imagine working with rowdy kids, or who used to be one of our rowdy kids.

My first experience with kids was in Chicago in 1977 as a volunteer at a neighborhood youth center while I was a student at Moody Bible Institute. I was still a rowdy kid myself. The answers to the other questions are more complicated. Debbie and I want to work with kids as long as we believe God wants us to be in this kind of ministry, or until He has another purpose for us to fulfill. I've decided on a test which I believe will show me when it's time for a change. I've asked Debbie to help watch for such a moment, when I act like I'm too tired or burned out to go on, or have simply lost my mind. Here is the simple test: When the time comes that I see or hear a child do something with my own eyes or ears, and the child tells me that he didn't do it, and I believe him, then it is time to retire from youth work and move on.

Apparently there are a few kids who think I have already lost my mind. They act like I will believe what they say over what I see with my own eyes. Last week I heard a boy call another boy an offensive racial name. (Both boys are black.) When I confronted him for his rudeness, he absolutely denied saying it, even though I saw him and heard him myself. Then, instead of an apology to the other boy, he became angry and aggressive to the point where he had to leave early. It isn't surprising to see this behavior. They see their parents, sports and entertainment “heroes” and politicians set the pattern: deny reality to push their agenda, and then get angry and ridicule those to whom they should be apologizing. I passed my test again, so I'm not ready to retire. The Bible teaches us to walk by faith and not by sight, but this applies to God's promises, not to a kid's lies or a politician's talking points.

They're Back Again

Kids Clubs here at MYC are as full as I have ever experienced, with short to very long waiting lists in every age group. Even our high school club, which in the past has been the only club without a waiting list now has kids who are waiting to get involved. A few of our current MYC Club members are new, and a few others have been to our summer camp or previously have been on our waiting lists, but the great majority of our kids were with us last year. Many have been with us as long as I can remember. There are now kids in high school who were in intermediate school when Debbie and I began our work with MYC. All of us who work with kids here at the Mission believe that the strongest reason for kids returning to camp and club year after year is the relationship. Not only do we work with most of the same kids and familes year after year, but we have been blessed with most of the same staff and volunteers year after year, and this greatly helps with building relationships. The need is great, and our relationships with these families are key to meeting the needs. Some of our kids represent the second generation of camp and club attendance for the family. Yes, these kids can drive us crazy, and not every moment is enjoyable, but we do enjoy seeing them and getting to know them year after year.

They Are Coming!

There are thirteen of them. They will be loud. They don't know our rules. They don't listen well. They are easily bored and easily distracted. They don't know how to play our games. They have short attention spans and small bladders. They outnumber us. They are waiting. And they are coming!

You're right if you think that they sound pretty intimidating; maybe we'll even admit a little scary. What am I talking about? If you know kids, you may have already figured it out. I'm talking about our newest class of 1st graders here at MYC Club. Each July, we give a chance for kids who may want to be in MYC Club during the school year to have a head start by joining Summer in the Son, which is our summer club program. In May, we give applications to kindergarten students who have been identified by the teachers as having a need for MYC and who could benefit from Club next year. The teachers may have noticed early behavior issues or inadequate families or simply kids who could use some attention, some structure, or some relationships with loving adults.

This year we have thirteen of these little ones. This is the biggest number of kindergarten graduates to begin Summer in the Son in the five years I have been involved with summer Club. Six of them are enthusiastic younger siblings of current MYC kids. This tells us that their older brothers and sisters have enjoyed Club and that their parents are trusting us with the little ones as soon as we can get them. Some of these kids have been asking and waiting to come to MYC since they have been watching brothers and sisters and cousins come to Club. Seven of them represent new families for MYC and a new opportunity to build relationships with families who recognize MYC as a way to meet the needs of their kids. We thank God for the chance to serve Him by serving these kids and their families.

Yes, it is a little intimidating. We will need a lot of energy, patience, and love. Please keep us in your prayers. All of our kids are challenging, and a large number of new kids at the same time can be overwhelming, but also remind us to look to God for the strength, love, and wisdom we will need. These kids are everything described in the opening paragraph, but even more so they are God's creation who God loves and for whom God has a purpose. God isn't scared. Bring them on!

You Make Me Want to Get Maried!

Debbie and I have known “Ivy” for the four years we have been involved with MYC Club. She uses two different last names because of her confusing, complicated family. Her little brother has a different last name, which isn't the same as mom's last name One brother has been in prison for a violent assault. Another brother openly displays “sexual orientation” issues. It's safe to say that the families who work at MYC are not what she is used to seeing at home.

Earlier this month Ivy was working with Debbie at Youth Enterprises, which is our job program for high school students. The subject of conversation was work related, not about relationships or marriage. Seemingly out of nowhere, Ivy said, “Ms. Debbie, seeing you and Mr. Mark makes me want to get married!” It really wasn't out of nowhere, though. She has been watching us and listening to us as we relate to each other while we work with the kids.

It isn't by accident that we have married couples working at MYC, because these kids need role models who display the fruit of God's spirit through their marriages. This hasn't been the only time the subject of marriage has been brought up by the kids. One boy told Greg that watching Greg and his wife made marriage look like fun! Some girls have asked me if Debbie and I ever argue. (Of course, I tell them that Debbie and I have disagreements whenever Debbie is wrong about something.) It's encouraging to know that the kids are watching us and learning from us. It's also a little scary, knowing that you are being watched, but that's a part of building relationships and a reason to pray. We also pray that these kids can break the cycle of destructive family lifestyles which have caused them to be at risk and need us.

Eagle Scout from MYC

Monday May 10, MYC Club senior Antwan Howard was honored in a special ceremony at the Youth Center for earning the rank of Eagle Scout. He is a member of Scout Troop 380, which meets at MYC Wednesday afternoons, with Bart Williams as Scout Master. We are excited because Antwan is the first Scout from our troop to earn Eagle Scout.

Antwan comes from a loyal “MYC family”, having followed his older siblings by being involved in MYC Club since primary school. He has also been in Youth Enterprises through high school and in the Scout Troop since fifth grade. His Eagle Scout project was the Forked Deer River Trail. Antwan, with help from the rest of our Troop and others in the community, cleared and marked a trail alongside the north bank of the river. The trail is for the enjoyment of those who like walking or enjoy nature, and will be part of what we hope someday to be a trail system or riverfront park. The trail begins west of the Mission, where the clearing meets the woods along the river behind the Farmer's Market. It follows the river and then to some ponds and up to the levee. MYC Club kids and others have already enjoyed the trail, and Antwan invites you to try it out for yourself! Just look for the signs or ask one of us.

The Scout leaders, MYC staff, and Mission staff are all proud of Antwan. Few Scouts anywhere have the determination to earn the highest rank. He never quit or used any of the convenient excuses available to him, such as poverty and little parent involvement. He instead has shown what our kids can accomplish with the desire and some encouragement and help from caring adults. Antwan's attitude and accomplishment has been a blessing to us and we pray for God's blessings for him as he enters the next season of his life.