Merry Christmas!! I thought I'd enjoy saying that while it's still legal here in America. (Actually, I'll still be saying it when the haters make it illegal!) Christmas is about Christ and it always will be about Him. I hope you can celebrate His birthday knowing Him personally and that you invite Him to the celebration at your church or with your family.
This morning there was a notice in our local newspaper to an “unknown father.” Someone is trying to adopt a child who needs a family and they are required to attempt to find and notify the biological “father.” To tell the truth, he's not ever been the “real father” if he needs to be found in this manner! Today I attended a funeral for a man who gave his life to save his son. This man was a hero and his sacrifice imitated Christ. His family didn't need to put a notice in the paper to find him.
Have you ever thought about the fact that, even though Jesus had the perfect, ultimate dad in heaven, His heavenly father knew that He would need a human father on earth? Even God's son needed an earthly father to hold Him and spend time with Him and mentor Him while He was away from home on this earth. God chose Joseph and that had to be an awesome privilege and joy for Joseph. Debbie and I have had the privilege and joy to be chosen to be the adoptive parents for two girls, and now are also enjoying the treasure of grandkids.
There are a couple of disgusting and horribly deceitful bills in congress at this time which, if passed, will hurt children and families and our whole country and culture. One is dishonestly called the “Every Child Deserves a Family” Act. This would force adoption and foster care agencies to put innocent children in homes with homosexual “parents” and with no care for marital status. If congress has sunk low enough to pass this, then there will be helpless children forced into homes where they will be raped by homosexual “men”. Kids will be abused and neglected by adults who don't even care enough and aren't mature enough to commit to a marriage before they live together or try to adopt a child. The relationship between the adults aren't permanent, so they won't be capable of meeting the needs of children. The foster and adoptive systems are supposed to provide for children and protect them and not provide them to homosexual pedophiles or immature people trying to meet their own needs by adopting! Kids deserve parents who provide and protect, not perverts who want their perversions approved.
Another lie in congress is deceitfully called the “Respect For Marriage” act and is an attempt by those who have no respect for families and are willing to destroy America by repealing DOMA.
Our biggest problem in America is not the economy. It's a moral problem, a sin problem, and a common sense problem! I hope to blog more on this subject as we get closer to the next election.
Jesus didn't have to look for an “unknown” father. He had Joseph on earth and His father in heaven. Joseph was a real man and a real husband. Mary and Joseph had a real marriage and were good parents. Let's all be good parents during the season when we celebrate the birth of Jesus the Messiah.
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Monday, December 5, 2011
Thank You, God!
Thank You, God
for grace, mercy, and love
for Jesus
for your sacrifice
for the cross
for the empty tomb
for defeating sin, Satan, and death
for giving us a purpose and hope
for salvation and forgiveness
for peace and joy
for the Holy Spirit
for Debbie
for blessing our marriage
for my parents
for my brothers and sister
for my daughters Tamara and Sheria
for each of my grandkids: Alydia and Clayton, Maddox and McKinnley, and for Tia and TJ
for Debbie's family
for the Union Mission, the Mission Youth Center, and for Camp
for my job
for choosing us to help do your work
for each child or teenager we have gotten to know
for our co-workers
for my education
for electricity, running water, and air conditioning
for our home and our furniture
for our cars
for this computer
for our church and our pastors and leaders
for my health and for Debbie's health
for our country which was founded and led by Christians
for blessing our country (We are not just “lucky” like Obama says)
for the freedom to write this note
for keeping your promises
for your word, the Bible
for Christmas, for your first coming as a baby and for your promised second coming
for answering prayer
for grace, mercy, and love
for Jesus
for your sacrifice
for the cross
for the empty tomb
for defeating sin, Satan, and death
for giving us a purpose and hope
for salvation and forgiveness
for peace and joy
for the Holy Spirit
for Debbie
for blessing our marriage
for my parents
for my brothers and sister
for my daughters Tamara and Sheria
for each of my grandkids: Alydia and Clayton, Maddox and McKinnley, and for Tia and TJ
for Debbie's family
for the Union Mission, the Mission Youth Center, and for Camp
for my job
for choosing us to help do your work
for each child or teenager we have gotten to know
for our co-workers
for my education
for electricity, running water, and air conditioning
for our home and our furniture
for our cars
for this computer
for our church and our pastors and leaders
for my health and for Debbie's health
for our country which was founded and led by Christians
for blessing our country (We are not just “lucky” like Obama says)
for the freedom to write this note
for keeping your promises
for your word, the Bible
for Christmas, for your first coming as a baby and for your promised second coming
for answering prayer
Monday, October 31, 2011
Are We Successful?
One morning this week I saw one of our 2nd grade MYC Club boys at the doctor with his mother. When I asked them how he was doing, his mom answered that he wanted to go back to school after his doctor visit so that he could go to MYC that afternoon. It's encouraging to hear that kind of feedback. It helps because it isn't always clear how to define and measure success in a ministry to children where relationships are emphasized.
Occasionally we are asked if we are successful here at MYC. Before I can answer I always need to first ask how should we define success. Is it how many donations we receive? Is it how many kids we serve? Is it counting how many kids make a commitment to follow Christ? Is it about making a positive difference in the lives of children or in the community? How long should “success” take?
We have seen our share of disappointments. A family we have come to know moves away and we lose touch. A girl gets pregnant. Boys lose their temper or fight. Someone gets arrested or suspended from school. Kids reject Jesus' sacrifice and example, or a spiritual commitment fails to translate to Christ-like behavior. Kids lie to us or talk about risky behavior on Facebook.
These kids and their families are facing some serious barriers to what we in America or even in the church call success. Parents ignore God's design for the family and the children pay an awful price. “Friends” put pressure on them to make stupid choices. The neighborhood is a negative environment. The government subsidizes poor choices and encourages dependence on government instead of faith in God. Entertainment is perverted and violent. Hormones are raging. The pop culture says “It's all about me!” There are few jobs here. Hate and anger are common in many of these families. Our kids act as if they are deaf. We have limited time with them at MYC.
We see some encouraging signs, too! Kids return to MYC year after year, and even stay after high school. Parents trust us and send younger siblings. Parents who were themselves involved in Mission youth activities 10 or 20 years ago are making sure that their kids are involved in MYC. These parents have good memories and built relationships with MYC staff and want their kids to have the same opportunity. There are school successes. Kids want to volunteer or be MYC leaders. We see better behavior in MYC kids when compared to new kids or non-Club members at church, Camp, or school. The Timothy Project discipleship group continues. Relationships are built. We have a consistent, dependable, loving staff. The only age we recruit is 1st grade because there is a waiting list for kids to be in MYC in the other grades. Many of our kids attend church with staff. We see growth in our long-term kids, such as unselfishness, controlling anger, or spiritual maturity. Most Youth Enterprises graduates have jobs. We get to be involved in our kids accomplishments and milestones. Kids and families come to us for help outside of MYC. Kids develop new skills. We have our first Eagle Scout. There is personal growth in the staff. Attendance in MYC is high. God meets the needs of MYC as we strive to meet the needs of our community.
Are we successful? Ultimately God will be the definer and judge of that. We are responsible to be faithful and good stewards of our time, resources, and gifts. We are trusting in God for the results, and we praise Him that He is trustworthy to keep His promises.
Occasionally we are asked if we are successful here at MYC. Before I can answer I always need to first ask how should we define success. Is it how many donations we receive? Is it how many kids we serve? Is it counting how many kids make a commitment to follow Christ? Is it about making a positive difference in the lives of children or in the community? How long should “success” take?
We have seen our share of disappointments. A family we have come to know moves away and we lose touch. A girl gets pregnant. Boys lose their temper or fight. Someone gets arrested or suspended from school. Kids reject Jesus' sacrifice and example, or a spiritual commitment fails to translate to Christ-like behavior. Kids lie to us or talk about risky behavior on Facebook.
These kids and their families are facing some serious barriers to what we in America or even in the church call success. Parents ignore God's design for the family and the children pay an awful price. “Friends” put pressure on them to make stupid choices. The neighborhood is a negative environment. The government subsidizes poor choices and encourages dependence on government instead of faith in God. Entertainment is perverted and violent. Hormones are raging. The pop culture says “It's all about me!” There are few jobs here. Hate and anger are common in many of these families. Our kids act as if they are deaf. We have limited time with them at MYC.
We see some encouraging signs, too! Kids return to MYC year after year, and even stay after high school. Parents trust us and send younger siblings. Parents who were themselves involved in Mission youth activities 10 or 20 years ago are making sure that their kids are involved in MYC. These parents have good memories and built relationships with MYC staff and want their kids to have the same opportunity. There are school successes. Kids want to volunteer or be MYC leaders. We see better behavior in MYC kids when compared to new kids or non-Club members at church, Camp, or school. The Timothy Project discipleship group continues. Relationships are built. We have a consistent, dependable, loving staff. The only age we recruit is 1st grade because there is a waiting list for kids to be in MYC in the other grades. Many of our kids attend church with staff. We see growth in our long-term kids, such as unselfishness, controlling anger, or spiritual maturity. Most Youth Enterprises graduates have jobs. We get to be involved in our kids accomplishments and milestones. Kids and families come to us for help outside of MYC. Kids develop new skills. We have our first Eagle Scout. There is personal growth in the staff. Attendance in MYC is high. God meets the needs of MYC as we strive to meet the needs of our community.
Are we successful? Ultimately God will be the definer and judge of that. We are responsible to be faithful and good stewards of our time, resources, and gifts. We are trusting in God for the results, and we praise Him that He is trustworthy to keep His promises.
Friday, September 30, 2011
Just Wait Until Your Uncle Gets Home!
Wait Until Your Uncle Gets Home!
It seems like I hear more of our MYC Club kids talk about their uncles than about their dads.
It's been clear to me for many years now that the most common cause of pain to the at-risk kids with whom we work is the lack of a father in the home or in the lives of our kids. If you haven't already read my book “Front Line Observer, please give it a look if you would like to understand more about this sad epidemic. What I've begun to notice recently is who are the most common replacements for permanent male relationships with these kids. It may not be who you think. The substitute dad isn't the grandpa, step dad, mom's boyfriend, or even a brother, although I've seen some exceptions. From what I have seen, it looks like the most common, most permanent male relationship these kids have is with a maternal uncle or otherwise possibly an older brother. Like the biological “fathers” of these kids, the grandfathers, step dads, and mom's boyfriends or temporary live-in “fiance” are only temporary and often negative relationships in the lives of these kids. The male relatives on the father's side often drop out of the relationship along with the father, and the grandfather often was not a good example to his own son. True, many of our kids have step brothers or half brothers, but they also are too often a temporary relationship or a poor example. The males that we have remaining in these kids' lives tend to be mom's brother or half brother, or maybe a brother who has the same mom but often a different dad.
So, you may respond, at least there is a male role model in the home in the form of mom's brother or an older sibling. The fact is, though, that this relationship doesn't usually meet the needs of the child and is more often just another poor role model. Remember: he came from the same incomplete family and so he wasn't mentored by a good male role model himself. If mom's younger brother lives with her, then he is often immature and unwilling or incapable of being responsible for himself, much less for a needy and impressionable niece or nephew. An older sibling often has simply gone further down the wrong path. At least, because he is a blood relative on the mom's side, the relationship tends more toward being permanent. What I have noticed, however, is that these guys way too often tend to be unemployed, in legal trouble or in a gang, have perverted attitudes, or have gotten another girl pregnant themselves. For an extreme example, one of the young men in a family with whom we work was recently murdered at home by his own maternal uncle, who had recently gotten out of prison. Some of the moms I know have gotten into legal trouble or have lost their homes due to the behavior of a brother who mooches off of them. Other moms have gotten into trouble because of their loyalty to their own kids or to the the overgrown children who got them pregnant.
So, you may feel that this trend is no big deal or that it's a permanent part of our culture now. Maybe these kids should just get past the fact that their dads have disappeared. They can learn about life from teachers or older guys in the neighborhood and the government pays for their home and food. What's the problem? The problem is that there are severe consequences to our kids and to our culture. We who know, love, and serve these kids see anger, violence, school failure, dangerous behavior, problems bonding or trusting, disrespect to women and authority, selfishness, irresponsibility, and attention-seeking behavior, just to identify a few of the consequences. We have too many boys who seem to believe that they are only good for fighting or for getting girls pregnant. Society doesn't teach them this twisted view. They learn this from their “dads” and from their moms who tolerate and encourage immature behavior by the dads.
Uncles and older brothers can't completely take the place of dads. Neither can we here at MYC with a few hours each week with our kids. What we can do here is to have men and married couples on staff. We are trying to step in and step up, and I challenge the other men in our community to do so. Every mom should be able to say, “Just wait until your father gets home!”
It seems like I hear more of our MYC Club kids talk about their uncles than about their dads.
It's been clear to me for many years now that the most common cause of pain to the at-risk kids with whom we work is the lack of a father in the home or in the lives of our kids. If you haven't already read my book “Front Line Observer, please give it a look if you would like to understand more about this sad epidemic. What I've begun to notice recently is who are the most common replacements for permanent male relationships with these kids. It may not be who you think. The substitute dad isn't the grandpa, step dad, mom's boyfriend, or even a brother, although I've seen some exceptions. From what I have seen, it looks like the most common, most permanent male relationship these kids have is with a maternal uncle or otherwise possibly an older brother. Like the biological “fathers” of these kids, the grandfathers, step dads, and mom's boyfriends or temporary live-in “fiance” are only temporary and often negative relationships in the lives of these kids. The male relatives on the father's side often drop out of the relationship along with the father, and the grandfather often was not a good example to his own son. True, many of our kids have step brothers or half brothers, but they also are too often a temporary relationship or a poor example. The males that we have remaining in these kids' lives tend to be mom's brother or half brother, or maybe a brother who has the same mom but often a different dad.
So, you may respond, at least there is a male role model in the home in the form of mom's brother or an older sibling. The fact is, though, that this relationship doesn't usually meet the needs of the child and is more often just another poor role model. Remember: he came from the same incomplete family and so he wasn't mentored by a good male role model himself. If mom's younger brother lives with her, then he is often immature and unwilling or incapable of being responsible for himself, much less for a needy and impressionable niece or nephew. An older sibling often has simply gone further down the wrong path. At least, because he is a blood relative on the mom's side, the relationship tends more toward being permanent. What I have noticed, however, is that these guys way too often tend to be unemployed, in legal trouble or in a gang, have perverted attitudes, or have gotten another girl pregnant themselves. For an extreme example, one of the young men in a family with whom we work was recently murdered at home by his own maternal uncle, who had recently gotten out of prison. Some of the moms I know have gotten into legal trouble or have lost their homes due to the behavior of a brother who mooches off of them. Other moms have gotten into trouble because of their loyalty to their own kids or to the the overgrown children who got them pregnant.
So, you may feel that this trend is no big deal or that it's a permanent part of our culture now. Maybe these kids should just get past the fact that their dads have disappeared. They can learn about life from teachers or older guys in the neighborhood and the government pays for their home and food. What's the problem? The problem is that there are severe consequences to our kids and to our culture. We who know, love, and serve these kids see anger, violence, school failure, dangerous behavior, problems bonding or trusting, disrespect to women and authority, selfishness, irresponsibility, and attention-seeking behavior, just to identify a few of the consequences. We have too many boys who seem to believe that they are only good for fighting or for getting girls pregnant. Society doesn't teach them this twisted view. They learn this from their “dads” and from their moms who tolerate and encourage immature behavior by the dads.
Uncles and older brothers can't completely take the place of dads. Neither can we here at MYC with a few hours each week with our kids. What we can do here is to have men and married couples on staff. We are trying to step in and step up, and I challenge the other men in our community to do so. Every mom should be able to say, “Just wait until your father gets home!”
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
My Mom Can Beat Up Your Mom!
“My mom can beat up your mom!” “You should see my mom fight!” “Our neighbors are afraid of my mom!” Is it just me, or does this kind of bragging just sound bizarre? I've heard this recent perversion of an old traditional boast from some of our MYC kids lately. If bragging about fighting isn't stupid enough by itself, then feeling proud of your mom for her ability to be violent is pathetic. Things get sadly twisted when dad isn't around to be the provider and protector, or when the kids don't know enough about dad to brag about him. Last year a 12 year-old boy threatened me that his dad would beat me up, (his way of saying it was too foul to print here), because I wouldn't let the boy butt in front of a line of smaller boys in order to be the first to hit a pinata. I knew his family situation. He bounced back and forth between mom and grandma and dad wasn't around. I could have reminded him that he couldn't even find his dad to have him try to beat me up, or that his dad was probably in jail or to too drunk to do it. Instead I just told him, as I was escorting him out the door, that his dad could come and speak to me about his behavior if he wanted to do so. There was no need to remind this hostile young boy of reality and increase his pain or his need to pretend that his dad was capable of standing up for him. Anger is a common trait among kids with dads who have disappeared from their lives. I never heard from his dad and felt no need to hide or to get some big friends.
God created the family and the role of the father includes responsibilities that require staying with the kids and the mother of the kids. Some of these responsibilities are to provide a home and other physical needs, and to protect the family from harm. In the work I do and the kids I know, I am constantly being reminded of the damage done to children and to our society by guys who get a girl pregnant and then leave her and the kids to fend for themselves. A new service is opening in our town for housing mothers and children. I have to admit that, unfortunately, there is a need for such a facility. I also know that this will not permanently solve the problem for our community or for the women living there temporarily. The problem will be solved and prevented when men act like men and take responsibility for their actions and for the consequences of those actions. If you really are a man, you won't have sex or get a woman pregnant until you are faithfully and permanently married to her and are committed to doing your best to meet the needs of your kids. Instead of only treating the symptom, we also need to admit and solve the problem. Ideally, why should this home for women need to ask the community for money? Get it from the guys that got them pregnant! The destruction of the family didn't start with the homosexuals. It started with irresponsible guys and the girls and the government who allow and encourage them to get away with ignoring their responsibilities. God's way is the only way that works. The tragedy of homeless unwed mothers has a solution. Let's obey God and solve it!
God created the family and the role of the father includes responsibilities that require staying with the kids and the mother of the kids. Some of these responsibilities are to provide a home and other physical needs, and to protect the family from harm. In the work I do and the kids I know, I am constantly being reminded of the damage done to children and to our society by guys who get a girl pregnant and then leave her and the kids to fend for themselves. A new service is opening in our town for housing mothers and children. I have to admit that, unfortunately, there is a need for such a facility. I also know that this will not permanently solve the problem for our community or for the women living there temporarily. The problem will be solved and prevented when men act like men and take responsibility for their actions and for the consequences of those actions. If you really are a man, you won't have sex or get a woman pregnant until you are faithfully and permanently married to her and are committed to doing your best to meet the needs of your kids. Instead of only treating the symptom, we also need to admit and solve the problem. Ideally, why should this home for women need to ask the community for money? Get it from the guys that got them pregnant! The destruction of the family didn't start with the homosexuals. It started with irresponsible guys and the girls and the government who allow and encourage them to get away with ignoring their responsibilities. God's way is the only way that works. The tragedy of homeless unwed mothers has a solution. Let's obey God and solve it!
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Llama Eggs
“Why is that llama laying down over there?” “It's sitting on it's eggs!” This bit of wisdom was overheard during an exchange between two of our primary MYC Club kids. Twenty-four of us were enjoying a close-up look at some exotic animals while riding through the Tennessee Safari Park in Alamo, TN. I had never heard of llama eggs, but she talked with the confidence of an expert. I love to hear little ones talk, whether it's grand kids or club kids. They remind me of a quote from Ronald Reagan, where he said that it's “not that they're ignorant, it's just that they know so much that isn't so!”
We are all ignorant in some ways; it's impossible for a human to know everything. Ignorance can actually be a step to gaining wisdom, if we recognize our ignorance, stop arguing and making excuses, and diligently seek the truth. I believe that when we are in heaven, we will get to use all of our capabilities, including all of our brains. Meanwhile, while we are still on earth, we have to put up with others who “know so much that isn't so!” Such wisdom from children is funny and usually harmless. The problem is when we make choices or react to something based upon something that we think we know but about which we are ignorant or deceived. That's not funny or harmless. For instance, when one of our know-it-all kids argues a call with the referee, he then gets put out of the game. Another example is a government that thinks it can spend itself out of debt into prosperity. One of our kids had not developed good interview skills, but assumed she wasn't hired at a restaurant because of her race. If you make your choices based upon these kinds of “wisdom”, then you will keep making stupid mistakes.
These are just a few examples of the dangers of acting from ignorance. By far the biggest danger, though, is our ignorance of God and His Word. When I talk about spiritual matters with our Club kids, I sometimes ask how we know if we are a Christian or how we can know that we are going to heaven. There are three common but dangerously ignorant answers I hear. One is that you earn your way to heaven by being good. Another is about an emotional experience at church. The third is about with which church they are involved. Some of these kids seem almost inoculated to the true message of Christ by this false “wisdom.” Jesus himself clearly said that He is the way, the truth, and the life and that no one will come to God except through Him. I pray that all of our kids, everyone I love, and anyone reading this will not be toward God's Word like the kid who argues with the referee and gets an attitude and blames others for being out of the game. Eternity is a lot longer than a ballgame, llamas don't lay eggs, and we are all invited to Heaven through Jesus!
We are all ignorant in some ways; it's impossible for a human to know everything. Ignorance can actually be a step to gaining wisdom, if we recognize our ignorance, stop arguing and making excuses, and diligently seek the truth. I believe that when we are in heaven, we will get to use all of our capabilities, including all of our brains. Meanwhile, while we are still on earth, we have to put up with others who “know so much that isn't so!” Such wisdom from children is funny and usually harmless. The problem is when we make choices or react to something based upon something that we think we know but about which we are ignorant or deceived. That's not funny or harmless. For instance, when one of our know-it-all kids argues a call with the referee, he then gets put out of the game. Another example is a government that thinks it can spend itself out of debt into prosperity. One of our kids had not developed good interview skills, but assumed she wasn't hired at a restaurant because of her race. If you make your choices based upon these kinds of “wisdom”, then you will keep making stupid mistakes.
These are just a few examples of the dangers of acting from ignorance. By far the biggest danger, though, is our ignorance of God and His Word. When I talk about spiritual matters with our Club kids, I sometimes ask how we know if we are a Christian or how we can know that we are going to heaven. There are three common but dangerously ignorant answers I hear. One is that you earn your way to heaven by being good. Another is about an emotional experience at church. The third is about with which church they are involved. Some of these kids seem almost inoculated to the true message of Christ by this false “wisdom.” Jesus himself clearly said that He is the way, the truth, and the life and that no one will come to God except through Him. I pray that all of our kids, everyone I love, and anyone reading this will not be toward God's Word like the kid who argues with the referee and gets an attitude and blames others for being out of the game. Eternity is a lot longer than a ballgame, llamas don't lay eggs, and we are all invited to Heaven through Jesus!
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
They Keep Coming Back!
“I'm going to stay in MYC Club until high School!” “Me too, I wish we could come every day!” This was part of a conversation between a couple of our MYC Primary Club kids as we were getting out of the van and walking into MYC. I took what I heard as a show of enthusiasm and not a warning! We enjoy their smiles and displays of excitement, and we're glad that they want to be with us. Most of our kids come to Club or Camp year after year, unless the family moves out of town. Why do they keep coming back? Is it the food? The games in the gym? The social time? Lessons about God's love? Is it homework time? (Probably not!) While most of these are reasons our kids come back, we believe that the relationships with the MYC staff and volunteers has a lot to do with it. We try to make sure they know that we love them and that we want them to be here. MYC is not just a job where we watch the clock and can't wait until we can go home. (Although honestly, with at-risk kids there are days when we are tempted to do this!)
One of the many ways God has blessed MYC is that we have staff and volunteers who stay here for years. Another way we are blessed is to have married couples working together here. I'm especially blessed to get to work closely with my wife, Debbie. Relationships are built when the kids come year after year and get to spend time with the same adults every year. Relationships are key to what we do here, and there is no substitute for time in developing them. This is clear to us and may be so obvious to you that you may be wondering why I am wasting space and your time by writing about it. The sad reality, however, is that many of the parents of these kids don't seem to understand this truth. Dads or even moms are sometimes completely missing from the lives of our kids. Some see their dad for only a few days in the summer. Many live with a grandma or another relative instead of with parents. Many move around often, in and out of the homes of various relatives or friends. It's not uncommon for our kids to have to make calls after Club to ask where we need to drop them off, or for us to drive to more than one house in order to find an adult who is available to supervise them. Moms will have various “men” in and out of the home, which confuses the kids and can put them in danger. These kinds of choices by the parents are the reasons why these kids are at-risk. Parents who can't commit often raise kids who can't cope.
This is why we are here. This is why we have both men and women serving here. This is why it's so great to have married couples spending time with these kids. The kids see that we love each other and that we love them. When they know that they will see the same faces year after year, they keep coming back.
One of the many ways God has blessed MYC is that we have staff and volunteers who stay here for years. Another way we are blessed is to have married couples working together here. I'm especially blessed to get to work closely with my wife, Debbie. Relationships are built when the kids come year after year and get to spend time with the same adults every year. Relationships are key to what we do here, and there is no substitute for time in developing them. This is clear to us and may be so obvious to you that you may be wondering why I am wasting space and your time by writing about it. The sad reality, however, is that many of the parents of these kids don't seem to understand this truth. Dads or even moms are sometimes completely missing from the lives of our kids. Some see their dad for only a few days in the summer. Many live with a grandma or another relative instead of with parents. Many move around often, in and out of the homes of various relatives or friends. It's not uncommon for our kids to have to make calls after Club to ask where we need to drop them off, or for us to drive to more than one house in order to find an adult who is available to supervise them. Moms will have various “men” in and out of the home, which confuses the kids and can put them in danger. These kinds of choices by the parents are the reasons why these kids are at-risk. Parents who can't commit often raise kids who can't cope.
This is why we are here. This is why we have both men and women serving here. This is why it's so great to have married couples spending time with these kids. The kids see that we love each other and that we love them. When they know that they will see the same faces year after year, they keep coming back.
Monday, May 2, 2011
If I Disappear
Record-breaking earthquakes around the world.
Record-breaking or crazy weather, such as the floods, snow, and hail here in West Tennessee.
People pushing for a one-world currency system. Governments in deep debt or going bankrupt.
Oil prices and food prices. Famine in places like North Korea, Uganda, Ethiopia, and Pakistan.
Political unrest all over the Middle East and in Africa. Threats and attacks against Israel.
Gay “marriage” and other perversions. Awarding special status, position, and protection to gays.
Little concern for human life, such as the drug war in Mexico and killing unborn babies in the USA.
Creeping socialism. More people depending on the government to meet all needs or solve problems.
The federal government eager to take over the responsibilities and privileges of local and state governments, charities, or families.
An administration, congress, and courts who ignore, circumvent, or try to reinvent the Constitution.
Government leaders who insult Christians but honor Islam, earth worship, and other false religions.
Anti Christian and anti Israel hate. Our leaders turning against Israel and toward Israel's enemies.
Persecution of Christians is an epidemic, although ignored by our government and media.
Powerful people push for a “new world order,” or “globalization” or “global governance.”
Sharia law in the US courts. The UN becoming increasingly dominated by Marxists and Muslims.
Political correctness: “tolerance” of anything except Christianity. Revising history to eliminate God.
Lukewarm churches and lukewarm Christians, who look like the world instead of Jesus.
These are some of the events and conditions in the world in the last couple of years which may be fulfillment of Bible prophecy. I won't pretend to know for sure that we are on the threshold of the end times, and I'm not making a prediction, but as a Christian I have a responsibility. I need to be God's instrument to make certain that everyone I love, anyone I can influence, and everyone with whom I serve here at MYC is ready for the promised return of Christ. You are ready if you have put your trust in Christ, the risen Son of God.
If there is a rapture of the church as one of the events in Christ's return, I and all Christians will disappear in a flash! I'm praying and working for MYC to suddenly be empty because all of the kids will disappear with us. I hope my family and everyone I know disappears. Actually, I can't think of anyone who I hope will be left behind to endure hell on earth. Jesus didn't want anyone left behind either, so He died for all of us. We just finished celebrating His resurrection. Unfortunately, there will be those left behind who have chosen to ignore God's love and the Bible's warnings. I hope you aren't one of them! If I disappear, I'll be with Jesus! If you are reading this after I disappear, don't look for me, but look into God's word and to Jesus for your salvation!
Record-breaking or crazy weather, such as the floods, snow, and hail here in West Tennessee.
People pushing for a one-world currency system. Governments in deep debt or going bankrupt.
Oil prices and food prices. Famine in places like North Korea, Uganda, Ethiopia, and Pakistan.
Political unrest all over the Middle East and in Africa. Threats and attacks against Israel.
Gay “marriage” and other perversions. Awarding special status, position, and protection to gays.
Little concern for human life, such as the drug war in Mexico and killing unborn babies in the USA.
Creeping socialism. More people depending on the government to meet all needs or solve problems.
The federal government eager to take over the responsibilities and privileges of local and state governments, charities, or families.
An administration, congress, and courts who ignore, circumvent, or try to reinvent the Constitution.
Government leaders who insult Christians but honor Islam, earth worship, and other false religions.
Anti Christian and anti Israel hate. Our leaders turning against Israel and toward Israel's enemies.
Persecution of Christians is an epidemic, although ignored by our government and media.
Powerful people push for a “new world order,” or “globalization” or “global governance.”
Sharia law in the US courts. The UN becoming increasingly dominated by Marxists and Muslims.
Political correctness: “tolerance” of anything except Christianity. Revising history to eliminate God.
Lukewarm churches and lukewarm Christians, who look like the world instead of Jesus.
These are some of the events and conditions in the world in the last couple of years which may be fulfillment of Bible prophecy. I won't pretend to know for sure that we are on the threshold of the end times, and I'm not making a prediction, but as a Christian I have a responsibility. I need to be God's instrument to make certain that everyone I love, anyone I can influence, and everyone with whom I serve here at MYC is ready for the promised return of Christ. You are ready if you have put your trust in Christ, the risen Son of God.
If there is a rapture of the church as one of the events in Christ's return, I and all Christians will disappear in a flash! I'm praying and working for MYC to suddenly be empty because all of the kids will disappear with us. I hope my family and everyone I know disappears. Actually, I can't think of anyone who I hope will be left behind to endure hell on earth. Jesus didn't want anyone left behind either, so He died for all of us. We just finished celebrating His resurrection. Unfortunately, there will be those left behind who have chosen to ignore God's love and the Bible's warnings. I hope you aren't one of them! If I disappear, I'll be with Jesus! If you are reading this after I disappear, don't look for me, but look into God's word and to Jesus for your salvation!
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
We Will Still Defend Marriage!
Anger issues.
Immaturity, impulsiveness, selfishness, and self control issues. Inability to delay gratification.
Poor social skills, attention craving, insecure, and poor manners. Whining or constantly worried.
School behavior and success issues, and legal trouble.
Disrespect of others. Inappropriate behavior. Lack of reverence. Personal drama creation.
Drug addiction.
Listening and following directions issues. Inability to keep a job. Authority issues.
Bonding issues. Quitting a relationship, a team, a job, or school. Trust issues.
Moral issues. Honesty issues. Sexual perversion issues. Sexually transmitted diseases.
Hitting or fighting as a way to react to or resolve conflict.
Sociopathic behavior. (Not recognizing the rights of others or showing remorse for hurting others.)
Much more likely to be abused, abandoned, or neglected.
Poor choice of role models. Celebrity worship. Gang involvement.
Confusion about God.
Confusion about love. Love is misunderstood to be conditional or temporary; only a brief feeling.
Cheating at school or in sports.
Bullying. Hating.
Depression.
These are only some of the common behavior traits and character issues which we have seen in our work with children who have parents who have decided not to follow God's plan for a marriage and for a family. Sexual partners who cannot commit to a traditional marriage produce kids with serious problems. (If you are interested in more of what we have learned about this issue, please read my book, entitled Front Line Observer.) We have seen the casualties of the war against the family, and now some in our government have chosen to inflict even more.
Now we have a leader in Washington who has claimed that the Defense of Marriage Act is somehow unconstitutional, and some in congress who are trying to overturn it. What God has designed and what human nature, human needs, and human history have confirmed is suddenly against our law? This leader has made many bad policy decisions, but this one cancels his right to be our leader. A chief law enforcer who tells his Justice Department to no longer defend our law which confirms marriage as a union between one man and one woman has forfeited his right to leadership and has no moral authority to tell anyone what to do. This decision may cause more damage to our nation and to our people than anything else has ever caused. This policy is consistent with the definition of a sociopath, and ignores reality and the will of the people. To give special rights, privileges, and status to some people, simply because they like to have perverted sex with members of the same gender, is immoral and dangerous beyond description. God loves everyone, and made laws for our protection and provision. He designed our bodies and emotions and knew that homosexuality was unnatural, unsafe, destructive, and perverted.
Here at the Mission Youth Center, we defend marriage and we demonstrate it. We are blessed to have committed married couples serving here. Showing true love and real marriage helps meet one of the greatest needs we can meet for the kids who come here, because almost all of them live with the pain of being from a “family” which has chosen some kind of “alternative lifestyle”. You can't defy God and the natural order He created without inflicting painful consequences and you cannot redefine marriage in order to pacify perversion without destroying people.
Immaturity, impulsiveness, selfishness, and self control issues. Inability to delay gratification.
Poor social skills, attention craving, insecure, and poor manners. Whining or constantly worried.
School behavior and success issues, and legal trouble.
Disrespect of others. Inappropriate behavior. Lack of reverence. Personal drama creation.
Drug addiction.
Listening and following directions issues. Inability to keep a job. Authority issues.
Bonding issues. Quitting a relationship, a team, a job, or school. Trust issues.
Moral issues. Honesty issues. Sexual perversion issues. Sexually transmitted diseases.
Hitting or fighting as a way to react to or resolve conflict.
Sociopathic behavior. (Not recognizing the rights of others or showing remorse for hurting others.)
Much more likely to be abused, abandoned, or neglected.
Poor choice of role models. Celebrity worship. Gang involvement.
Confusion about God.
Confusion about love. Love is misunderstood to be conditional or temporary; only a brief feeling.
Cheating at school or in sports.
Bullying. Hating.
Depression.
These are only some of the common behavior traits and character issues which we have seen in our work with children who have parents who have decided not to follow God's plan for a marriage and for a family. Sexual partners who cannot commit to a traditional marriage produce kids with serious problems. (If you are interested in more of what we have learned about this issue, please read my book, entitled Front Line Observer.) We have seen the casualties of the war against the family, and now some in our government have chosen to inflict even more.
Now we have a leader in Washington who has claimed that the Defense of Marriage Act is somehow unconstitutional, and some in congress who are trying to overturn it. What God has designed and what human nature, human needs, and human history have confirmed is suddenly against our law? This leader has made many bad policy decisions, but this one cancels his right to be our leader. A chief law enforcer who tells his Justice Department to no longer defend our law which confirms marriage as a union between one man and one woman has forfeited his right to leadership and has no moral authority to tell anyone what to do. This decision may cause more damage to our nation and to our people than anything else has ever caused. This policy is consistent with the definition of a sociopath, and ignores reality and the will of the people. To give special rights, privileges, and status to some people, simply because they like to have perverted sex with members of the same gender, is immoral and dangerous beyond description. God loves everyone, and made laws for our protection and provision. He designed our bodies and emotions and knew that homosexuality was unnatural, unsafe, destructive, and perverted.
Here at the Mission Youth Center, we defend marriage and we demonstrate it. We are blessed to have committed married couples serving here. Showing true love and real marriage helps meet one of the greatest needs we can meet for the kids who come here, because almost all of them live with the pain of being from a “family” which has chosen some kind of “alternative lifestyle”. You can't defy God and the natural order He created without inflicting painful consequences and you cannot redefine marriage in order to pacify perversion without destroying people.
Monday, February 28, 2011
My Day In Court
My Day In Court
Last month I spent a day in court. No, I haven't been arrested or charged with anything, (at least yet!). It was a session of our county's Child and Family Court known commonly around here as “child support court.” The official reason for spending a morning there was for me to testify for one of our former foster daughters in a hearing involving custody and child support for one of her children. Not surprisingly, the “father” of the child never even bothered to show up, even though he had requested the hearing. He had apparently done so to harass the mother of his child, but later had realized that the truth about his behavior was about to be exposed in court, so as is his habit, he took the easy way out.
As it turns out, there were three hearings that morning that were of interest to me. One was the case I have described, another was for the “father” of one of my grandkids, and the third involved another of the girls who had lived with Debbie and I when we were houseparents at New Life Youth Home. All morning I sat and watched and listened to a sad parade of selfish people who cared little or none about meeting the needs of their own children. I saw anger, sadness, frustration, drama, delays, accusations, complications, and a sickening display of immature excuses from “men” and sometimes “women” who didn't want to take responsibility for their own actions.
Some of these guys couldn't pay child support because they were escorted to court from the jail. Some had addictions which they had allowed to control them instead of the instinct to provide for themselves and their families. Some were just lazy, irresponsible children themselves. Some were going to jail that day unless they paid some child support. One man was even arrested and put in handcuffs in front of his teenage daughter for his outstanding warrants. His daughter had been brought to court for her unruly behavior, and he had come to convince the judge to give him custody of her instead of putting her into treatment. Now both “dad” and daughter are in the custody of the state and are costing money to the taxpayers. I wonder what he was smoking that morning to think the judge would give the girl to him. I don't have to wonder why her behavior was habitually bad.
Guys, you need to “man up” so I will no longer need to put quotation marks around the words “man” or “father” when I refer to you. I'm even offering to help! If you will read it and put the advice to dads into action in your lives, I will give you a free copy of my book, Front Line Observer. It's time to act like men!
Last month I spent a day in court. No, I haven't been arrested or charged with anything, (at least yet!). It was a session of our county's Child and Family Court known commonly around here as “child support court.” The official reason for spending a morning there was for me to testify for one of our former foster daughters in a hearing involving custody and child support for one of her children. Not surprisingly, the “father” of the child never even bothered to show up, even though he had requested the hearing. He had apparently done so to harass the mother of his child, but later had realized that the truth about his behavior was about to be exposed in court, so as is his habit, he took the easy way out.
As it turns out, there were three hearings that morning that were of interest to me. One was the case I have described, another was for the “father” of one of my grandkids, and the third involved another of the girls who had lived with Debbie and I when we were houseparents at New Life Youth Home. All morning I sat and watched and listened to a sad parade of selfish people who cared little or none about meeting the needs of their own children. I saw anger, sadness, frustration, drama, delays, accusations, complications, and a sickening display of immature excuses from “men” and sometimes “women” who didn't want to take responsibility for their own actions.
Some of these guys couldn't pay child support because they were escorted to court from the jail. Some had addictions which they had allowed to control them instead of the instinct to provide for themselves and their families. Some were just lazy, irresponsible children themselves. Some were going to jail that day unless they paid some child support. One man was even arrested and put in handcuffs in front of his teenage daughter for his outstanding warrants. His daughter had been brought to court for her unruly behavior, and he had come to convince the judge to give him custody of her instead of putting her into treatment. Now both “dad” and daughter are in the custody of the state and are costing money to the taxpayers. I wonder what he was smoking that morning to think the judge would give the girl to him. I don't have to wonder why her behavior was habitually bad.
Guys, you need to “man up” so I will no longer need to put quotation marks around the words “man” or “father” when I refer to you. I'm even offering to help! If you will read it and put the advice to dads into action in your lives, I will give you a free copy of my book, Front Line Observer. It's time to act like men!
Friday, January 28, 2011
Sanctity of Life
Sanctity of Human Life Week
“This is murder! The president should do something about this!” These are some of the passionate responses of our MYC high school kids to a video we had just watched together. Kermit Gosnell, a baby killer from Philadelphia, was the subject of a CNN interview with a Philly district attorney. It was the killing of a woman and at least seven babies born alive which prompted these responses from the kids. In case you haven't heard, Mr. (I can't call him doctor) Gosnell has gotten rich performing late term “abortions” by inducing labor and then killing the babies after the children were out of the womb alive. The woman had died from anesthesiology he had prescribed. There are more grisly details I will not mention here. Feel free to look up this story if you have a strong stomach or if you have been deceived to believe abortion is a medical “choice.”
“You couldn't pay me enough to work for him!” “I could never do that!” “If he killed my child, I'd kill him, but then I'd be guilty, too! ” These were more of the responses. “God would forgive him if he repented.”, and “Yes, God would forgive him because we have a forgiving God!”, are also quotes from kids in the discussion. In terms of insight, passion, and participation, this was one of the best talks we have had with our older club kids. I believe that some of them understand that once it becomes accepted to do something like kill unborn babies in the womb, then the next steps would include killing babies after they are born, or maybe the handicapped or elderly. The only part of the CNN interview and our talk for which they had no response was when, after it was suggested that our president should stop this kind of murder, I asked if they would like to know Obama's position on this issue. After they said yes, I had to tell the disappointed group that as an Illinois State Senator, he had voted against a law that would have required doctors to give medical care to save the lives of babies who had survived attempts to kill them and had been born alive. Support for Obama during the election had been unanimous for the kids in MY club when we took a poll. I didn't grab for a “gotcha!”moment and wasn't even tempted to follow with “I told you so!”, but just let the kids think quietly for a few seconds before jump-starting the conversation with another question. My goal in showing the video wasn't to bash Obama, but to encourage these kids to recognize what is right and wrong, and to realize where allowing wrong to be the law of our land is leading us.
“This is murder! The president should do something about this!” These are some of the passionate responses of our MYC high school kids to a video we had just watched together. Kermit Gosnell, a baby killer from Philadelphia, was the subject of a CNN interview with a Philly district attorney. It was the killing of a woman and at least seven babies born alive which prompted these responses from the kids. In case you haven't heard, Mr. (I can't call him doctor) Gosnell has gotten rich performing late term “abortions” by inducing labor and then killing the babies after the children were out of the womb alive. The woman had died from anesthesiology he had prescribed. There are more grisly details I will not mention here. Feel free to look up this story if you have a strong stomach or if you have been deceived to believe abortion is a medical “choice.”
“You couldn't pay me enough to work for him!” “I could never do that!” “If he killed my child, I'd kill him, but then I'd be guilty, too! ” These were more of the responses. “God would forgive him if he repented.”, and “Yes, God would forgive him because we have a forgiving God!”, are also quotes from kids in the discussion. In terms of insight, passion, and participation, this was one of the best talks we have had with our older club kids. I believe that some of them understand that once it becomes accepted to do something like kill unborn babies in the womb, then the next steps would include killing babies after they are born, or maybe the handicapped or elderly. The only part of the CNN interview and our talk for which they had no response was when, after it was suggested that our president should stop this kind of murder, I asked if they would like to know Obama's position on this issue. After they said yes, I had to tell the disappointed group that as an Illinois State Senator, he had voted against a law that would have required doctors to give medical care to save the lives of babies who had survived attempts to kill them and had been born alive. Support for Obama during the election had been unanimous for the kids in MY club when we took a poll. I didn't grab for a “gotcha!”moment and wasn't even tempted to follow with “I told you so!”, but just let the kids think quietly for a few seconds before jump-starting the conversation with another question. My goal in showing the video wasn't to bash Obama, but to encourage these kids to recognize what is right and wrong, and to realize where allowing wrong to be the law of our land is leading us.
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