Will You Take Me Home and Adopt Me?

Will You Take Me Home and Adopt Me?
It was time to take the kids home from High School Club. She said, “Mr. Mark, I don't want you to take me to my dad's house! I want you and Ms. Debbie to take me home and adopt me!”
Assuming she was kidding, I answered, “You wouldn't like my rules and you'd miss your brothers!” Her response was, “I'm serious! My dad never does anything for me and my step mom is mean!”
This is not an extremely unusual or even a very surprising conversation to have with one of our club kids or, in the past, with one of our foster kids. Debbie and I have, of course, adopted our daughters, had custody of another girl, and have considered and discussed adoption with a couple of others. Others on staff here at the Mission Youth Center or at camp have had similar questions from some of the kids with whom they have built relationships. At this time, one of our club members who was abandoned by his parents is living with one of the members of our MYC staff. During our 19 years of living with teenagers at the group home, over a dozen kids had brought up the subject.
Why do our kids have these thoughts and bring up this idea? It isn't because any of us are rich, and Debbie and I have firm rules. We don't spoil our kids. (Well, maybe we spoil our grandkids a little with time and affection.) It's probably natural for kids to fantasize at some time or another that there are “greener pastures” somewhere with another family. However, in talking to these kids, it is clear that there is often something deeper going on than being mad about getting grounded or not getting the latest cell phone. These kids see the love for each other shared by the married couples who minister at MYC. They see our love for our families and our commitment to each other. They see that we trust each other and that they can trust us. They see that real love is unconditional, that real love is a choice and not just a feeling, and that real men take care of their kids. They see parents who sacrifice for their kids. Unfortunately, the reality is that very few of our kids see much of the kind of parenting taught in the Bible in their own families or in their community. We are glad for the opportunity to show love to these kids and hope that our example will encourage them to break the cycle of unmarried parents and single parents in their generation.
I'm issuing this challenge to all parents: Your kids need BOTH of you!